On Turning 30

My first birthday celebrated around September 20th, 1980.

What a year. In those days between 1979 and 1980, Solid Gold debuted on TV. John Lennon was still alive. Paul McCartney was arrested in Tokyo. "My Sharona" was a number one song on the charts as well as "Heart of Glass" by Blondie and "Rock with You" by Michael Jackson. Pink Floyd had just released The Wall, a rock opera/concept album dealing with self isolation. Ozzy released The Blizzard of Ozz and claimed his new title as the Prince of Darkness. Rod Stewart put out his first greatest hits album while ABBA put out their second.

On film people found themselves divided over Star Wars and Star Trek. Jim Henson put out the first muppet movie. Peter Sellers, Alfred Hitchcock, John Wayne, and Zeppo Marx died. Meanwhile Zooey Deschanel (Tin Man, 500 Days of Summer), Christina Ricci (Casper, The Addams Family, Sleepy Hollow), Heath Ledger (10 Things I Hate About You, The Dark Knight), and Mena Suvari (American Beauty) draw their first breaths of life.

Jimmy Carter was president, yet he was later defeated by Reagan. Mount St. Helens erupted. Pac Man was released into arcades and CNN began its first broadcast. Patty Hearst was released from prison. Margaret Thatcher becomes prime minister of England while Carter is recovering from an attack by a swamp rabbit while hunting. Saddam Hussein takes office and the Soviet Union invades Afghanistan. Mc Donald's introduces the Happy Meal.

Today John Lennon is dead. George Harrison too. Syd Barret and Richard Wright from Pink Floyd are also gone. Michael Jackson will moonwalk no more. "My Sharona" is considered a staple song of Gen X, Ozzy has/had/has his own reality show on MTV, and the works of ABBA have been turned into a hit musical and movie. We've seen the remake of Star Trek and the prequels to Star Wars. Jim Henson is also long gone, but his muppets live on. Heath Ledger died before The Dark Knight was released, and somewhere today an Oscar winner is being born.

Barack Obama is president. The Wii is the new rage and you can play it with kids in China. There are now ten billion cable news channels. Saddam Hussein is gone, but the problems in Afghanistan are still there. The Happy Meal is still around, however it is the Super Value Meal that will kill you.

Has the world really changed in 30 years? Sure we have more technology, money, pollution, drugs, crime, and stupid people now, but have things changed? Small pox was supposedly eradicated in 1980, but is now making a comeback because people refuse to be vaccinated. We still don't have a cure for the common cold, but we do have a serum that will make your eyelashes grow faster and thicker.

In 30 years I've survived chicken pox, numerous kidney stones, an appendix about to rupture, pneumonia, falls, bumps, and bruises. No broken bones (thank God) but a few broken hearts (mine and those I've broken). In elementary school I wanted to marry Michael J. Fox; middle school - Luke Perry; high school - Keanu Reeves. I've babysat my sister, neighbors, friend's children, and my nephew. I've reached my full height just shy of 4'11'', which landed me a very prestigious job in Disney World. I've worked in offices, cleaned bathrooms, bagged groceries, and taught 7th, 8th, 9th, 10th, 11th, and 12th grades. I've gone to Ocean City, New Orleans, Atlanta, St. Marys, London, Prague, Hungry, Nairobi. I've hiked down and up a volcanic crater. I swam with dolphins. My sister and I laughed so hard so many times that one of us surely peed our pants in the last 30 years (well, 26 years). I've totalled a car, gone to college a few times, learned to cook, never got that sewing machine I was promised in 8th grade, got Nick Mason's autograph (thanks Dad!), ran into Richard Simmons in the Orlando International Airport, failed to pee in a bush in the African Savannah, sneezed so hard my gum flew out of my mouth, survived the 80s and the 90s (ahhhh the hair...ahhhh the clothes), read some good books, saw some good movies, listened to some good music, and ate some good food. I've gone to Disney World so many times I've lost count but still look forward to going soon. I've finally nailed down the difference between a dependent and independent clause (good thing too). Still haven't gotten the concepts of math and why people wear bathing suits as clothes.

So it's been a good 30 years. Here's hoping for another good 30. And here's also hoping that the wood paneling so popular in 1979 never comes back. Never. Or that gold color the furniture was. Really. Also, shag carpeting. What were you people thinking then? Or floppy disks. I mean yay for the technology boom, but I'm so glad that as I grew the size of the computer shrank. But really - was it really necessary to have wood paneling in every room? And where are the flying cars everyone in the 80s thought we would have by now? Maybe by 2040. That is if the automakers are still around, but that's a whole nother subject.